meeting your soul

To the Meeting Your Soul podcast. I'm far your host, and today I have Trevor with me, and I am so delighted to have a wonderful conversation, just exploring spirituality, yoga, all the things in the wellness world. And I would love for you to tell everyone a little bit about who you're and how you show up in this magical place called Earth.

Yeah, thank you. Yeah. It's a pleasure being here, first of all. Yes, absolutely. I'm really grateful. Mm-hmm. Yeah. My name's Trevor Taylor. I'm really from Texas. Mm-hmm. Out here in Washington now two years, and yoga instructor. Okay. And I rephrase that. I teach. Yoga. Mm. And I said because mm-hmm.

There's sometimes a stigma about being a yoga teacher. Mm-hmm. And then when people come into my classes, they realize the same person you have an interaction with on the street, the same person who would guide you through, I don't switch up. Yeah. I understand myself. The whole part. I'm find Trevor teaches yoga.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. You're like, I don't change my personality or who I am when I walk into the room or walk into the studio. Yeah. No, be someone's mom. The same in class's, also out friends. Yeah. So as it should be though. Right. That's the aim. Mm-hmm. Always shooting for that. Just being yourself, like no matter where you're Yeah.

So even online, that's where I gained a lot more popularity. After moving out to Washington I started to just dive more into creation. I came out here, I had like 2000 followers. Mm-hmm. I was a former high school teacher, high school coach. I saw that. Yeah. Yeah. I lived really like humble life hanging out.

Yeah. And then I moved out here and, and started to pick up some traction mm-hmm. And realized that I could show up in a way to support and encourage others to just take care of themselves. Yeah. Whatever that looked like. Mm-hmm. 'cause I mean, we know individually what we need better than anyone else does, truly.

Mm-hmm. So we can't expect everyone else to give us the answers. Mm-hmm. But if I can just, you know, share what I've picked up along my own journey and self love, I found like this pattern of things I can keep offering. And I found how yoga was, what really just was the driving force behind a lot of my transformation.

Got it. So I said, okay, well let me just share more yoga content. Mm-hmm. And before I knew it, that picked up into a lot more popularity on Instagram. Yeah. And I started to really lean towards that, realizing that that is what I was passionate about. Mm-hmm. I. That has now allowed me opportunities to teach large groups of three or 400 people, teach at the studio and be yoga twice a week and, and build a strong community of people who are maybe beginners in yoga or experienced practitioners and teachers.

Mm-hmm. And so we just find we're all looking for the same thing pretty much, which is, yeah, how can we be happy, healthy, and heal ourselves? Mm-hmm. Rather than having to rely on anything outside of themselves. Oh, I love that. Like little cook summer of whatever, you know, I'm just, people finish Well, but then I think it, it sounds like it started with really your own journey within yourself.

To be able to gain a deeper understanding of like what fuels you, what you're passionate about, and how you were actually personally healing and sharing those tools with others. Like, you know, not fishing for someone, but teaching them how to fish for themselves. Yes. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That's my thing. I love that.

Yeah. As a teacher, when I was teaching high school mm-hmm. I found that I oftentimes had students who just wanted me to give fish. Mm-hmm. Hmm. The answer. Mm-hmm. And one thing I prided myself on as an English teacher was like, I don't have your answer. Yeah. I'm just here to show you how to formula your ants.

I like that. So then I would guide 14 year old kids into like, learn how to really just get their message across mm-hmm. In a way that others might be able to receive. And then I found, okay, well if you can find this answer for yourself and then maybe articulate for someone else to understand mm-hmm.

How can I do this in other rounds? Yeah. And that's why I'm in now. Well, and like it's sharing a story, sharing your message, and like how can you kind of shift and mold that in order for it to be palatable to as many people as possible. Yeah, yeah. While still staying true and unique to who you are. That part.

Yeah. Yeah. Like that part

I'm Curve. I tried to please the audience. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Thinking that, oh, this is what y'all want and this is what's hot and this is what's trendy. And I just lost so much of my soul in, I can't even make two more post. I'm not, I come back tomorrow. Mm-hmm. But that's, I think there's a difference there.

And I, I saw this one poster sent was like, make less content make more art. And it's like, and I think art is that connector that for, especially for, and when I saw something it was like banks skiing. He was like what is it? It's like art reminds people that are like different that it's gonna be okay.

Well then it makes people who are kind of, this is, I'm definitely, I'm making this up as I go along. I was like, I just saw, but I remember it just like rang true for me. So it made me happy. But But then it was like for, and it makes people who are kind of in the matrix, if you will, feel uncomfortable.

So it's like they're gonna ch, they're gonna push the limits, but then for people that naturally think out of the box, it comforts 'em to know that other people do. So I think the more you're authentic, the more you're true to you, then the right people are gonna gravitate towards you. And then that's actually what solidifies that relationship.

And especially on an online presence, it's like authenticity is required for people to feel like they know you, even if they don't necessarily. Yeah, that's, that's true. Wow. Great way to put that too. Yeah. I've had some run ins recently. Mm-hmm. Some strangers. Yeah. But they'll see me in the streets and they're like, wait, you're true.

From, I'm yeah. Then they will gimme this kind of like life story spiel about how, oh, you know, I've changed their lives or I've impacted them. And so, and what I felt was a subtle way with the way they shared that message, I could tell. Yeah. And it was just based off authenticity. Like it be the post that I didn't really think would.

Do much. Mm-hmm. Because, gosh, cord with the front of the camera and I didn't edit it much. I threw a caption on. Yeah. And I'll get a million views. Oh. And then it's changing a lot of people getting these messages all day long. To me, I'm like, this is my heart. Like I'm putting this out here freely. 'cause it just feels easy to do.

Yeah. Enjoy it. Yeah. The ones where I'm like putting in the efforts, edit and do all this stuff. Mm-hmm. And I think other people might want, or businesses mm-hmm. Brand new. I mean, those might get the, the numbers, but like it doesn't get the same impact. No. So finding that middle ground, okay. Mm-hmm. The content creator mm-hmm.

The artist. Mm-hmm. I wanna be the artist who's creating content. Yeah. And just keep putting my pieces out. Yeah. And that makes that workflow feel even easier too. I get to that flow state wrong. I don't what time is right now, I'm having fun, but the kid. Oh no. Well, and that's where we're most creative, you know?

And that's where it's most I think divinely guided too. It's kind of like you are just the conduit for the message that's being shared. And the more you open yourself up to being that, the more that it can flow through you and the more that that, like, there's a reason why you are sharing what you're sharing in the way that you are.

Only you can do that. And it, that's why it touches people. 'cause it feels like, you know, it touches that same part of who they are. Yeah. And that's like, that's the beauty. I feel like that's what we're all, especially artists, that's what we're all here to do. And I think we can all create some type of art, even if not in like, the theoretical part of like what people think an artist may be.

Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. It's the art that the, the critics might not Yeah. Enjoy, but the everyday person mm-hmm. Really feels that connection. Who are these critics you speak of? I was like, theses.

Oh, well. Well, and do you, and that's actually what's going to make it go viral, you know? And there's like, there can be a formula. I've like taken a lot of marketing classes, I've done all these things and they're like, this is how you make your content go viral. But, and, but I follow, the people I've learned this from have also been like deeply spiritual.

So they're like, and they say, just lean in, find that flow state. Find that point where you feel like you're, you don't really know why you're saying it or why it's coming out, or why this is the message you need to share, or what outfit or what color, like all that stuff. Like, you don't really get it, but like, it feels right and then it just pops up and you're like, okay, well then that was something, you know, and I, but I, you allowing yourself to be that I think is really special.

And it's a gift. It's a gift that you're sharing with others. So thank you for doing that. It's a pleasure. Yeah. Thank you for sharing yours. Oh, I love.

I try to, you know, and that's the thing is like I do feel like there's just a message I'm meant to share and I'm just trying to share that in the purest way possible and just kind of navigating that. But I think peeling back the layers of allowing myself to really be seen too. Because there's so much of like how I think I should be showing up or how, you know, I should like dress or talk or speak or like all these things that kind of filter through my mind that I'm having.

It's like a lot of, I think, personally self work to go in to be able to content create or even just show up in any facet of your life in a very pure and authentic way. And that's been something that I've kind of navigated through, you know, honestly over the last 10 years. And I feel like I'm at this point where I'm like really stepping into like the fullest expression of me, but it took a while to get here, so thank you.

Was a big lesson that. A whole lot of lessons, Trevor, whole lot of fucking lessons. I'm Oh man. And I was like, which one do I pull from, tap into my intuition? Which one do I share? You know, there's no one like, and I know the sunset kind of generic, but I do believe that this is one that I feel like has been ring true for me.

There. There's only one me and I need to be that person. Period. Yeah. So like, don't worry about the bullshit, don't worry about being what everyone else wants you to be. Just be myself and that is going to resonate. That's going to like even, and I do this so much just face to face, like when you meet someone you know and like looking at them, seeing them, feeling them, being there with them.

I do have like, one of my gifts is I am able, I'm very empathetic, so like I can feel and I've like been with people when they've been like extreme trauma situations and I've been able to hold space for them and make them feel safe and seen and not like accepted even when they're in the midst of maybe one of the worst things that ever happened to them.

And when I like that, when I do that, then I know like. I think that that's a part of the reason why I'm on this earth. Because you know, when I, my first volunteer gig out of college while I was in college was at domestic violence and sexual assault services. So I'm literally with domestic violence victims or with, I used to go to hospitals while girls were going through their rape exams and being there for them.

And then my first job out of college was suicide prevention. So being there while people were considering suicide. So like all of like, I don't know if the average person necessarily wants to jump into those conversations, you know, but for me it felt right and I felt like I could be there for them in a way that, it's just hard, I think for a lot of people to be there and, but it's to be seen without even an ounce of judgment, you know?

Like, I'm, this is not your fault. You did nothing to deserve this. We're here and we're gonna make it through to the other side. And I, I got you. You know, and like, that's, so I would say, but that is me leaning into being me. You know? Did I necessarily like, was that the most, like, you know, was that on the career sheet of like, what, what things you could do?

You know, like, was that like, like, and I always like just lean, like, Hey, what do I need to do? How do I need to shuffle my gifts? And I think that that's such a big, it's a beautiful thing and it's a profound thing once you tap into that and then you drive that home. Like, just like you're talking about with yoga, it's like, this was easy for me.

This came, it wasn't easy, but it was easeful. Like I wanted to do it. I felt pulled to do it. It felt natural and I was getting a positive response because of it. And it wasn't probably instant. It probably took a little bit of time. Right? Definitely. Yeah. But then you saw the effects, and even now you're seeing people coming up to you and the impact that you're making in their lives.

Like, that's like living your truth, that's living your dharma, or at least that's what I, that's what I envisioned it to be. So that's good. That aligns with I'm reading this book, mastery by Robert Green. Mm-hmm. And he mentioned something, I think maybe like the first one or two chapters Yeah. About how your genetic code mm-hmm.

Has never been on this earth before, but Berman duplicate you. Right? Yeah. It never will be even for twins. Sorry, this is just, this is me. Like, what is twins?

Like how we begin to develop mm-hmm. Realize like we can manipulate our genetic code as we continue living. Interesting. So whatever experiences you're going through, huh? It starts to mm-hmm. Make a unique version of that original that was here. Mm-hmm. And then you'll never see another exact duplicate.

Going back to what you were saying, like show up as you do what makes you feel, do what feels intuitively natural to you. Mm-hmm. Exactly. Like there's some type of code that's already pushing us in that direction. Huh. I like to look at it like, okay, if we are looking at a micro look mm-hmm. Every cell in our body mm-hmm.

For the most part has the same s instruction. Mm-hmm. Yeah. But then it has a different code. Okay. And that individual cell says, I don't know exactly what I'm supposed to do. I just go in this direction. Mm-hmm. And there's a bunch of us that come together and now we're a femur. Yep. Got it. Okay. Mm-hmm. It's like they are coded to like create a bone or be a blood vessel or to be like an organ.

It's like there's, yeah. Okay. Okay. I get you. At their base level it was just mm-hmm. Cell. Mm-hmm. And it had a unique coat. Mm-hmm. And each one of those kind of went into its intuitive direction. Yeah. Without a mind to confuse it, say, I don't know. 'cause everybody else is going to the heart. Yeah. And I think I do want to be.

Part of the heart rather than the steam. Oh yes. You know? So I'm starting to realize, okay, I'm able to honor what I intuitively feel is like pulling me in the direction, whether it's soul or whether it's really like distinct. Mm-hmm. I like to honor that it will lead me towards where I'm already naturally.

Yeah. Like people call it supernatural, but I'm like a supernatural. Yeah. It's incredibly natural. Yeah. Well and it's like magnetically what you are are like, and I believe that we are, there's destiny, but there's free will. And so I feel like there, like it is what you are, it's already been written. It's like just following the path and it actually will lead you to more a harmonious state and happiness and fulfillment because it's what your genetic makeup is designed for you to do.

Yeah. Willingly follow what you already naturally. Right. Doesn't feel. Everything else is not calling you in that direction. Yeah. Your friends are like, I don't know about that. And the family says, are you sure about that? And yeah, your spouse is like, you still just gotta go with what feels like, say the course.

Yeah. Say the course stick to the plan. Yeah. Yeah. You've already, it's already trust yourself. Right. That that Oh man. And that comes a lot of tests because you have to trust yourself. Yeah. There's gonna be some times where, mm-hmm. Now you're internal conflict, like, well, I feel like this higher part of me mm-hmm.

Itself is pulling me in this direction. But like everything I've been conditioned to believe about myself, about the world around me and how they might interact with me mm-hmm. Is bringing up some moments of fear. Yeah. And. Scarcity. Mm-hmm. And maybe judgment. Mm-hmm. Which then makes, it makes this a little harder.

Mm-hmm. When you go in that direction, you got a little obstacles in our course. Right. A couple bananas, if you're familiar with Mario Kart. Yes. I was like, you got a couple shells thrown your way, you got a couple bananas. But then if you stay on the, you know, on the path, you'll, you'll find your way there.

I'm realizing that of those, most of those obstacles, at least for myself Yeah. And many others, is ourself. We have to learn how to get out our own way. Yeah. Because it's not like other people can stop. No, no one can really stop. You're in control of your life. So then there are some times where we don't.

Mm-hmm. And many of us may forget that we actually do. Yeah. And we let the subconscious kind of run things. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And we go back to old patterns. Yeah. Because it helps us feel safe and comfortable. Yeah. But right outside that comfort zone is our growth zone. Mm-hmm. When you step out of the comfort zone, you're now uncomfortable and uncomfortable.

You have to be in discomfort for extended periods of time. Sometimes. Sometimes there's those growing pains. Yeah. Physically and mentally. Mm-hmm. And emotionally, I think more often than not, that's, I think it's because it's unseen. We don't recognize the power that it has over us, but it's, it definitely can lead us astray.

Yeah. Beauty, meditation. Oh, it's hard to do the unseen work. Yeah. I, that's how I wire it down for people instead of like, oh, this spiritual experie, like you're doing the unseen. Mm. Which is the spiritual. Yeah. And it's not physical and you, it's not tangible. You can't touch it, but it's in your mind like, and it has just as much power.

It's something that you can, yes. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Would you rather work on that problem with your hands? You'd rather solve like your hair? Yeah. If it happened faster in the head, there must be a little more power right there. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. If I have to wait to do things with my hands, like I'm delaying my graph, I'm delaying what I already want from myself, I'm delaying my manifestation, I need to build it.

Mm-hmm. Instead, if I can just solve the problem in my head, I can skip a lot of this stuff. Yeah. And simplify it in general and make it less complicated. That's the thing. Mm-hmm. Like I bring more ease. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And that means we have to get outta our own way. Yeah. Because we are the ones that cause those obstacles.

Yeah. We are the obstacle on our own journey over. Oh man. But, and then it's like, I think meditation allows us the space and the opportunity to be able to pause, to be able to take a step back and to almost allow a little bit more to go into that flow state, maybe even to access what we already know to be true without talking ourselves out of it in the first place.

How long have you been meditating for? Ooh. A formal meditation or however you, however you've perceived it, or like it's come, appeared in your life. I would say maybe consecutive year, two years probably. Okay. Been honed in on that practice. Yeah. But prior to where I'm today. Okay. I'm 18 years old, I was preaching Really?

I was a licensed pastor Texas, no, say 18, straight out the gate. He was like, what do you wanna be pastor?

How long? I didn't like, that's just what I felt was mm-hmm. What I was going to go through. Yeah. And my first sermon all the way through my last, each one had such a impact, not just on me, but the people around, people who received the message. Mm-hmm. Lives were changed and they were inspired. Mm-hmm. And that word inspired, like to breathe life and breathe a too.

Mm-hmm. So I'm. What, like the power that's happening to these people when I'm like the vessel of it. Yeah. And the whole time I'm really confused. I'm 18 years old about to go college. I'm like, I don't even know what I'm doing right now. Yeah. You're like, I'm so how do old soul, but like, also like how are these, where am I even getting these pieces from?

Where's this insight coming from? So much like happening at the time. Mm-hmm. Luckily, you know, when I went through college, I had the opportunity to live with Discipleship Home. Mm-hmm. It was a college pastor who lived in the house. Cool. His assistant, graduate assistant. Mm-hmm. And then six undergrad grads.

No way. So we've all really held each other accountable to be the best version of ourselves, including going through like the conflicts, the struggles, the, the pushback when you get mm-hmm. Some constructive criticism. Yeah. From someone that you honor that you look up to back mm-hmm. And respect. And you're like, man, I know you want this from me, but like now I'm having to come face to face with like, oh, shadow.

And going through that for two years, but with loving guidance along the way, that's just say what a gift to have the guidance and to have the community around you as you were navigating through that. And that part like really changed everything. I'm sure. So you just threw a curve ball at me. You're like, oh, I was just didn't know that.

I knew you were a teacher, I knew you're in education. Yeah. But then how, so then for that, was it like, did you find the, the presence, I almost would say almost sounds like, or was it in prayer? Was it in prayer or was it in the steps, like study of the Bible? Like what was that, what was it? How was it appearing?

The meditation aspect came when I realized that prayer was something I think had been misunderstood. Mm-hmm. People would go into prayer, especially in that religious setting Yeah. And offer everything that they were looking for. And all their requests would never sit still enough to receive. Yeah.

Yeah. And the way my college pastor. Put it to me, said, if you set a table up, put two chairs. Mm-hmm. You sit on one side and say your prayer. Oh. And now wait. Mm-hmm. For the other side to speak. So you sit in that silence. Yeah. And just made me cry. Iap, I was like, like two chairs. Yes. Was like, make a small table of two chairs sitting here, write out my prayers.

Yeah. And I might even say my prayers out loud and read them. I hear them, but then I would allow myself to be in that silence. Yeah. And to see what things came up. Mm-hmm. Came to me. I was like, oh, this is a cool aspect where I feel like there's now a two-sided conversation. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And at the time, I, you know, maybe I could pray this to God, Jesus, holy Spirit, whatever it was at that time.

Now I realize like that was higher self and that was the source. Yeah. Giving me the message, the same message I was preaching when I was 18. Mm-hmm. Ability to connect with a higher source and like receive a message, but for me mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So that I could receive it Yeah. And then decide I could share it for my abundance.

Yeah. So doing that meditation in that aspect really allowed me to further my curiosity about spirituality. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Which ultimately led to me walking outta the church eventually because I was like, I have nothing against the church. Wow. I just realized there is so much more going on that I am aware of and that many of us might realize.

Yeah. So I'm looking for some answers. Hmm. And where did that take you? So sophomore year when I started at the discipleship, I, I also started practicing yoga online. Okay. 30 minutes a day. Oh. Got, had no idea what was taking place. I was just like, 30 minutes,

increase

that six 30 in the morning. Mm-hmm. From seven to eight, I go to the park. Right across the street in journal. Yeah. Wow. So that was my meditation. Had no idea. A very sacred practice actually. Yeah. I'm already practicing like limbs of yoga. Yeah. Yas and NES in my journal. Uhhuh. Uhhuh and Awesome. While I was doing that on the mat for 30 minutes, I go outside and now I'm in my meditation state.

Had no idea what I was doing. I'm underneath these trees. It's bright. It's like still dark outside. Yeah. So it's quiet, it's silent. Mm-hmm. Had no idea. All I was really doing at that time was like following the blueprint that I felt like, Jesus. Yeah. You just go out to the wilderness and prayer. So I was like, cool.

Same. You're like, gotcha. I can do that, I can do that. That's, that's easy. I'm about to this and pray. After I moved my body. Mm-hmm. Had no idea what was really taking us. Now, nine years later, I'm like, oh, oh, I get it. I see. I see what was doing like, but I was kind of doing that. And unaware of what I was doing.

But then you were following almost those little strings, right? Yep. Like you were like intuitively pulled in a direction and you're like, okay, this is naturally where I'm, what I wanna do, what I feel like is right to do. So I'm just gonna make it priority. I'm just gonna keep doing it. And like, and then, but I'm sure you saw, not that it was for the reward, but the fruits of your labor, like I'm sure you were feeling, you know, more at peace, more like a deeper understanding of yourself.

You're obviously having a positive reaction from the sermons and everything that you're sharing with other people. So you've been sharing messages, you've been, this has been, this is not new. This is not new by any means. Not at all. Yeah. I'm doing in new past. Mm-hmm. It just looks

growing up, I've. A leader. Mm-hmm. And had something to share and had an empowering message as a kid, but then it was like a smile and do it with laughter, joy. Mm-hmm. And at one point I thought I didn't have to do it like that. I had to do another way, but that didn't feel right. Mm-hmm. I went back to what feels authentic.

Yeah. Before I knew it, you know, it just continued to grow and grow and strengthen. Now I'm on the mat teaching these classes, but I'm also preaching a message the entire time. Exactly, exactly. Spoke to everything. Mm-hmm. I thought that was supposed to be physical. I'm like, I mean, that's a layer. No. Well, and I think that that's the difference, and I love that you brought this up when we first started chatting, is that there's a difference between a yoga instructor and a yoga teacher.

And I think an instructor guides you through the postures while a teacher teaches you about the postures and the deeper connection, the other limbs of yoga outside of the asana, because it's all, it is, the purpose is to yoga. We're trying to connect mind and heart, and that just doesn't come through the body.

It's an aid, it's a tool. Right. But it's not all of that. Yeah. Yeah. It sounds like yoga and all of these things really have been a tool to be able to age you on the path of self discovery. Yeah. And I am curious, like how has that continued to evolve over the last 10 years? It was, you know, you're in college, you're praying, you're meditating, you're stretching, you're doing all your stuff.

Like what does that look for like for you now? I went from journaling in college. Yeah. And that was a place for me to get thoughts out from Nonjudgment standpoint. Mm-hmm. That evolved into becoming more self-aware as a teacher. Soon as I graduated high from college. Yeah. And went straight back home to teach at the same high school I graduated from.

Oh, wow. Yeah. No way. So it was fun because I was able to go back into a place I was really familiar with mm-hmm. To teach to those who are from the same exact area, going through similar situations. Yeah. Being like my friends, little siblings and cousins and neighbors. So having that immediate reflection of self mm-hmm.

In the students, I was like, okay, if I can take care of myself, I can take better care of them. Yeah. Started going to therapy as I was teaching. Mm-hmm. More opportunities for self-awareness. Yeah. All of these things compiled with just a consistent like practice of building. Mm-hmm. The awesome. Wow. And this constant like understanding of what is this book trying to teach me.

Mm-hmm. What am my experiences teaching and what is it that I'm aware of, of myself while I'm in the midst of these experiences? Like almost from a more of a curious perspective though, point of view, whole journeys has been a lot of just curiosity. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And in order to be curious, I realized I had to drop judgment.

Mm. Because whole judgment will tell me that I know something. And my curiosity was like, I don't know either. And the more I approached the life, Childlike curiosity about, yeah. Not just the world around me, but the space within myself. Mm-hmm. Like that's what I love. Yeah. Sorry, you said that, that that ringed you.

Yeah. Inner space. Yeah. Instead of just focusing on the outer space. Mm-hmm. Curious about the depth of who I'm as. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Okay. My physical body is my body, but that's not me. Oh, yeah. In my mind I can study that. So that's obviously not me. Mm-hmm. So what else can I study about? Like who I am? Yeah. And once I moved out here two years two years ago and started going to yoga school.

Yeah. At eight limbs. That was an eight month program. Yeah. I love eight limbs too. They allowed me to understand more of like the. There is a, an approach to self study. Mm-hmm. That's why y y yeah. Yeah. There's an approach to this. There's already an ancient plan set in place where people have been doing this for 7,000 years.

Yeah. I didn't know that. Mm-hmm. I just knew of yoga as like shapes and poses. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And I hadn't been in apartment studio, never really had a membership. Mm-hmm. Everything just at home. Mm-hmm. Having that time to be amongst experienced practitioners who've been this since like the eighties. Yeah.

You know, they're, they're opening my eyes to not just being curious, but having curiosity with a plan. Mm-hmm. Like, Hey, I'm gonna be curious about how this plan mm-hmm. Impacts me. Yeah. So let me dive into the eight limbs and go into this path, this journey. What, what can I learn from these people? And then mm-hmm.

As a result, I began to learn more and more about myself. The subtleties is really like mm-hmm. A big part of this growth zone Yeah. Is not allowing the alarms to grab my attention. Yeah. Cannot be aware of even the most subtle things like changing in my breath, the tenseness in my face or my hands.

Yeah. And what do those typically indicate as I've studied these small things? Stress. Yeah. Right. Mm-hmm. Like, and if I notice that, I get a little excited, like mm-hmm. Well, what caused that? Can I be aware of it at that moment rather than retrospect? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 'cause I used to see it in hindsight, 20.

Yeah. But yeah, you can catch it at that moment. Yeah. Kind of ride the wave of that curiosity, like all, well, let's see what happens in life. Yeah. Leaning in almost step stepping back and observing what's coming up. Right. That's the one thing is to be the observer. Yeah. And that's where my journey has now taken is mm-hmm.

Being an observer of self. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. How my interactions with others. Yeah. React like causes them to react. Mm-hmm. And then realizing the subtle shifts of energy that happened to the collective. Yeah. Mm-hmm. So I can also study a little bit more of how I'm also inter intertwined, how I'm also unified with everybody else.

We're all unified. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Luckily being here in Washington, we had four seasons. Mm-hmm. So when I first moved here, I was in South Seattle and I would stare out the window and study the plants and study how in nature was going through the seasons, but also realizing how I was also in the same boat.

Well, yeah. We're a part of this. We are of the earth. Yeah. I don't know why at some point we built four walls and thought that we were no longer a part on the nature we come from. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So if we can learn what's going on in mother Nature mm-hmm. Collective and also learn a little bit more about what's going on in the individual.

Yeah. And realizing that correlation, I also look back on my own life. Mm-hmm. That's where retrospect came a huge part of my journey. Mm-hmm. I was able to catch patterns. Mm-hmm. Call it seasonal depression. And I realized I was just fighting the season. Yeah. Like a season in my life was calling me to slow down and I thought, I need to speed up.

I need to keep up what I was doing in the summer. Oh, the plants don't try to do that. And the plants know when the drop leaves. Yeah. And to kind of go into hibernation mom, right? Yeah. To die a little bit even. Mm-hmm. To cleanse, heal, dormant. Mm-hmm. Release was no longer serving. Mm-hmm. So when the new season comes out, love 'em all.

That's Yeah. Brand new. I learned that brand from plants new. Mm-hmm. And I had indoors and the ones I was studying outdoors whole time, I'm studying myself and I'm also studying other people. Mm-hmm. My interest in psychology and sociology mm-hmm. Really helped me, like have more a foundation to how to study people.

Mm-hmm. But it was open, it was just really my curiosity about my own experience, the experiences of others and how we were impacting one another and the correlations amongst all of it. Right. So much overlap. So much overlap and that we're not alone. That's not just you. Like there's, we're all in this together, and it's like, how can you support, how can you be there?

How can you almost share your story and what you're, what's going up, coming up for you as a way to connect deeper with other people? Because you are aware of this. You're studying this, this is a part of like your ritual, like what's important to you. But not everyone. People might be feeling it, but not, might not be able to express it or understand it on the same level because of their awareness just might not be as high, but it doesn't come up overnight.

Like everyone's in different cycles and different stages of their own self-discovery. And so meeting people where they are I think is really important too. But you've, it sounds like it is, it's become almost like an art form to you at this point. Well, and I, you know, I follow your social media and all that and like, just to hear you kind of talk through things.

It's just, it feels like you're just talking with someone about like, Hey, I thought about this today, and like, I just wanted to share it with you guys and like, see what you guys thought about it too. And it's like, it makes it playful, makes it, it makes it accessible because then it's like, it doesn't have to be this esoteric, like, you know, monk sitting on top of a mountain.

It's like, no, I'm just like living my life. We're all living this experience. So like how can we as a collective support one another a little bit more? But it's been what would you say is like, has been one of those subtleties that has kind of I don't know why this, but like, not smacked you in the face, but it has been like a whoa, like a wake up call, if you will.

Hmm. Or, or even a pattern or like a programming that you may have like learned or recognized over time. Yeah. One thing that I have recently uncovered with my mm-hmm. Was my we we're talking about polyvagal theory. Mm-hmm. I'm, I'm not familiar with that actually. Okay. So I'm jump into that future.

Yeah. One thing I was really accustomed to was disassociating. Mm-hmm. From discomfort. Mm-hmm. And that was a coping mechanism. That was a defense strategy that I had as a kid, and it helped. Yeah. So obviously if it helped, I'm gonna lean towards it more and more. Mm-hmm. And I realized that what helped 12 year olds me is not gonna help today's version.

Mm. I had to be aware of those patterns when I realized like, oh, rather than jumping into disassociation or what we would call a free state. Yeah. I had to learn to sit in that fight or flight. Mm-hmm. And discomfort. Mm-hmm. So I can go back to social engagement, which is my joy and enthusiasm. So that's the polyvagal theory.

Yeah. Is you're at the baseline. Mm-hmm. And your social engagement. Above that is fight or flight. Mm-hmm. Which is still a, I can do mentality. Mm-hmm. Like I can do something about this. Mm-hmm. If I feel fear, I can do something. If I'm irritated or angry or Ed, I can do something, I can take action. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. To that free state. Mm-hmm. And there's a lot of, I can't, I can't do anything I'm, it's like paralyzing almost. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I used to go to that 'cause it was to numb myself. Yeah. But in order to get back to social engagement, I had to be willing to sit through the discomfort. Mm. Of the irritation, fears, the fight or flight.

So I could go back into this and have an understanding as to like what was taking place. Yeah. To go back to being the observer rather. Let's escape. Yeah. Or even react. It's like, how do I stay in it without disassociating, but not necessarily participating? That was my mm-hmm. And I would, I was so good at not participating mm-hmm.

In order to keep the peace amongst everyone else. Mm-hmm. Yeah. That's what made it easier to just disassociate. But now I'm like, well, I know I'm not gonna be reactive. Mm-hmm. So can I just again, be the observer rather like neutral? Yeah. I wanna get outta this, this, so one of my stances that I picked up on is the breath.

I was gonna ask what, which will see use for this. Yeah. Yeah. Simply just noticing my breath. Right. And notice like the difference between controlling my breath and noticing it. Yeah. So I can just be an observer of how is this moment impacting my breathing. Okay. And if I realize like, oh, my breath is a little short, it's just in my chest.

I'm not gonna control it. I'm not gonna change it. I just wanna keep watching. So that way next time I breathe like this, I have a better understanding as towards taking. Yeah. And then once I've noticed it, I take some time to take control. Mm-hmm. If I can control my breath, I can control my nervous system.

Yeah, exactly. I can control my nervous system. Mm-hmm. I can control my experience mm-hmm. As a whole. Mm-hmm. My body, my mind. I love that, my decision making. Mm-hmm. And there I can control my life. Mm-hmm. A lot of us wanna control our lives, but haven't even gotten to control my breath. Yeah. So then we're trying to control everything on the external, which we don't actually have control over.

And then we do have, but what we do have control over is ourselves. So if the breath is subtle to Right. That's, that's how we bring life force energy into the body. Mm-hmm. I'm be mindful of how I'm inviting life force if I'm mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. If I'm not, I can understand why there's so much tension, this discomfort.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. There's a lack of life. There's a lack of breath. Yeah. There's a lack of vitality. And it sends us into the state of fight or flight. If we're holding our breath, that actually triggers your body and your nervous system to say you're in danger. But in our minds, we are perceiving that we are in danger.

So it's like being able to take a step back and just be able to soothe it a little bit. Self-soothing essentially. Right. Even in the moments where things might be filling a little chaotic. Yeah. Wow. How's it been going so far? It's beautiful. Really? Okay. It's beautiful. It's fun. Yeah. Being in this growth mindset, it's all the games.

Mm-hmm. I'm a child again, I'm playful energy, so I'm like, okay, I noticed that like my body starting to get a little tense, Uhhuh, this is a great time to be observ. Okay. So I sing back and I'm like, all right. Ooh, there's these thoughts and, and that happening earlier. It was subtle, but, but it did impact, like, okay.

I was on my way to the therapist last week, but I had. Woken up. I felt a little rushed. Yeah. And I had something I had to submit. Mm-hmm. And then I was low on gas. Mm. And I was running late. Yeah. And I had a tough conversation with my partner. Oh. And it wasn't really difficult, but it did bring an accumulation to everything else too.

And I noticed all the consultants. Mm-hmm. By the time I'm on the highway mm-hmm. My passenger mirror fell off. I just got the replacement. Right. Yeah. But it fell off on the highway and immediately I felt like, well, not, I noticed the desire to like be enraged. Yeah. But I was like, oh, this is fun. 'cause now I'm noticing how I mm-hmm.

Would have maybe responded to the situation if I wasn't a being the observer, I noticed a reaction before I could get mm-hmm. I was like, oh, this is sick. Yeah. Because I see how I led, how everything has led to that one emotion at one moment where I thought out like, yeah, to explode. Right? Yeah. And I was like, oh, I just know, like all of these throughout the day have led to this moment and it's only like 11 o'clock.

Yeah. I still made it to der on time. Mm-hmm. Right. I had like five minutes to spare you like, everything's well. And it's like, and now you're choosing how to respond versus then just having like, like you just said, like just having that reaction. But like, I appreciate you explaining it in the way that you did with the examples, because I think that we all often, there's so many points where people get to that point where the mirror falls off and people just lose it.

It's like, Every, like, the world's against me today. Why does everything keep going wrong? It's like, and, but it's the universe, testiness, it's all these things. It's like, are you gonna keep doing what you've done in the past or are you gonna do something different? Are you learning? Are you growing? Are you actually incorporating the things that you say that you are like trying to integrate?

And the whole things I noticed like my breath was short, whole morning. Whole morning. Now luckily I didn't get in as soon as I woke up like 30 minutes again. Oh, good. Yeah. So that allowed me to have a foundation. So based my awareness of my breath. Yeah. The start of the day. I said, I know how I'm, how I can breathe and how I like to, yeah.

All of these happenings between that end practice and me noticing when the mirror fell off. I hadn't really been aware of my breath, but I noticed how short. Mm-hmm. So I said, okay, let me come back to the subtle breath. Yeah. While I'm on the way, I'm on the highway, I got my all in my hand. I'm just, yeah.

Breathing. Taking it one beat at a time, one breath at a time. Mm-hmm. And I was realizing, oh, like this is how I take care of myself. Mm-hmm. This is how I can calm my nervous system. True. How I can continue to stay in that seat of awareness. Mm-hmm. Be the observer of my experience, rather than one who's being tossed back and forth about the wind in the waves.

Yeah. I'm in control of this. And Invictus is one of the poems that I continued to like refer back to my entire life. Mm-hmm. One of those last lines. He says, I'm the master of my faith. Mm-hmm. I'm the captain of my soul. In order to do that, there was a lot of other happenings in that poem mm-hmm. Where he talks about this.

It's tough. Yeah. I was thinking of that. Yeah. That whole poem sounds dark and and grueling. Mm-hmm. But like the end is racist. Like yeah, I go through all those things, but those are experiences. I'm the experience. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I get to experience it all. That's the beauty of this life. Yeah. You get to notice how this physical body and this mind mm-hmm.

How we can bring them two together and realize the tension in my body is related to the tension that's in my mind, which is also affected by the tension or the shortness of breath. Mm-hmm. I come back together, that mind body connection mm-hmm. I get those two unified, right. Yoga is unity of my body.

Mm-hmm. And the soul is really the one who's in charge of all this. Yeah. And that's me. Yeah. And then you come back into control, but then it all really roots down into your breath and the awareness of it and the like, almost the the attention that you give to it in every moment of every day. I think more people than not, don't really even pay attention to the depth of their breath.

That's like the first thing I do in every yoga class. I'm like, Gain an awareness to your breath. Where are you at? Where's your baseline? What's the cadence? What, where, what's the texture like, be curious, be aware of it. Be present to it. And then let's, let's then like, shape it a little bit to fuel us to help with the practice.

But we're going to use this as an anchor point and, and everything that we do. But it's like, that's because I know that that's what I need and that's what helps me get into, out of my head and into my body. And then there, that's where I'm able to access that divine nature. That's where I'm able to access my highest self.

And that's when the messages start to flow in. But you have to train yourself to do that. It takes a while. Yeah, it does. Yeah. The showing up time and time of again, moment by. Yeah. Not just one day at a time. No one breath at a time. One breath at every moment, literally. 'cause it is, things are gonna present themselves to you and it's like how you respond to it and react.

It's like a 'cause I, I would have to say my biggest, one of my old triggers used to be Difficult conversations with people. It's few people in particular, and I noticed that it was almost instant that I just would, like, I'm a really calm person and I think most people are like, I could never see you mad.

And I'm like, I have a fiery temper. I do. I'm gonna, I'm gonna keep real. I do. And so like, I, I just would like, You know, and I would feel this, you know, and so, but then I recognize like, okay, life is gonna happen. It's important to stand up for yourself. I'm a natural people pleaser too. So I think when people, sometimes my boundaries get pushed up against too, I have a harder time like staying calm because I'm like, you're intentionally pushing my boundaries.

And it makes me wanna like, you know, like, like Wonder Woman. Like, like just like, throw everyone away. Get everyone away. I'm like, I don't wanna unleash the rat. I don't wanna, I don't wanna, but if you're gonna push me to the way I'll, and so it's like, but then it's like, how can I one, be aware of my, like, my response, how I'm feeling, what, how, what they're saying, and like, How do I wanna respond?

How do I wanna feel after this conversation? How do I wanna feel a, like to feel empowered, but then also to still be compassionate, to recognize they're probably doing this for their own reasons. This has nothing to do with me and my day. Like I don't have to let my day be ruined by it. But it's hard to like, so that was like those, like I was always pushing up and I was like, Hmm.

And people are always like, my sisters know me well. And they're like, oh, oh, she's getting, I'm like, I need, but then no, I'm like, I gotta go take a walk. I'm gonna go, like, I'm gonna take a quick loop, I gotta do some breathing. I'm just gonna be out in fresh air. I think it'll help me. I'm gonna go reset really quick.

Or like, Hey, you know what? I can't really like, this conversation's overwhelm me a little bit, so I'm just gonna have to take a break. Can I call you back in like 10 minutes just so I can like, just ground a little bit? And then, and people are so receptive to it, and I don't know why for so long I felt like I wasn't able to do that.

Like, are you able to give yourself those breaks now and like, without, like, even just within everything, like you said, like you're counting the mo of Beats, being able to like do a mantra or something that's gonna help reset you. But like, how does that, how does that continue to come up even when maybe you don't inevitably or assuming don't have that space to necessarily do that in the moment.

You know, there are times where I might not be able to. Take those five minutes, right? Mm-hmm. Or I can't go for 108 reads on the mom. Yeah. So I know how to always have like a toolbox. Mm-hmm. Like that's why I love practically yoga. It provides so many tools. Mm-hmm. That I'm also reading a lot of books.

Yeah. Because I'm seeking mentorship. Even if it's not in person, I can learn from the lessons that someone else has already presented and they've quite intentional. 'cause they wrote a whole book about it. Truly. Yeah. So they tried to cut out the fluff and make it easy for me. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. From there, I'm able to take some of the things I've picked up along the way and say, okay, in this case maybe it's nice if I don't say a whole lot today and I just honor the fact that my energy's not there.

Yeah. And there are other times where I realize I just need to take some time to just really focus on my breathing while we're here in this space, in the discomfort. Can I breathe? Mm-hmm. Like a yin practice might not have a lot of blocks to support you. But you're gonna be there for two minutes in that one pose.

Yeah. Can you breathe through the discomfort mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Of this moment. Mm-hmm. And the moments that continue. Mm-hmm. So that you can find ease in the moment. Eckhart totally wrote, wrote in one of his books at the end. He says, the first step is in like, essentially finding some peace. Mm-hmm. Is acceptance.

Yeah. Learning just to accept what is. Yeah. Then you approach what you've learned to accept with joy. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And kind of have this playful nature about it. Mm-hmm. The next step is in the final step, enthusiasm. Taking your joy and having a plan. Yeah. So I'm like, okay, I noticed I was getting frustrated and I just, I had some resistance to that moment.

Mm-hmm. I learn to accept it's what it's Mm. Mm-hmm. Now that I'm here, can I breathe in the fact that like, this is uncomfortable. Mm-hmm. And I'm choosing to be in the discomfort. Yeah. Oh, now it's not as, Unbearable un kind like mm-hmm. I can play around with this. Yeah. Because I'm not caught up in the pain.

Well, and see the humor in it maybe a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. Because I, I was like, it's me. I'm the one who's like resistant to all of this. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Why would I fight? What's happening in I can't control? No. Then I say, okay, well now what do I wanna do with this? Mm-hmm. Because a kid realizes, oh, this rock is cool, but like this rock can also be a tool.

And then you start seeing their whole life start building out what this we thought was just some sort of like, stupid up. Yeah. And they're like, I found some innovative way to like, approach life with this, this new finding rock. Like, no, it's not. It's so much more. Yeah. I realized like, this come, this, this uncomfortable moment.

Mm-hmm. Does not just have to be a comfortable moment. This be a moment of growth for me. Yeah. Yeah. So let me really like, Find a way to like play around and, and grow with this. 'cause it's fun. Yeah. And now I like enjoy the, the tough work with the shadows because mm-hmm. I'm the growth mindset. I get excited when I realize, oh, this is the opportunity for me to grow.

Cool. Let's grow. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. This is opportunity for me to just kind of be here. Mm-hmm. Sit with these things and enjoy. And I'm cool with that. Yeah. Well, like you said, it's like that acceptance of what is, and that I, the Power of Now was definitely one of those books that like changed my life forever.

And I remember I was like, The pre, like this moment is all we really have and the stress, our stress is actually caused by resisting by what's going on right in front of us, what's going on, what's in front of us. So it's like, why not just like, have an appreciation of it? Why not take the lesson? Why not learn?

Why not lean in? Just see what it has to offer you because there's a re The reason was that the reason why this experience is happening right now is because this is like, how do you know if something's supposed to happen right now? Because it's happening right now. It's like, so what do you wanna do about it?

It's like, but then to have some joy and like even like to lean into the idea of even just to be enthusiastic about what's going on in front of you. Like look at it like life can all be that if you want it to. It was designed to help you become the highest fullest expression. So like finding in the flow, finding in the little ways, the little nooks and crannies as you kind of make your way dance to be the dance.

Like why not? What do you love to do? What brings you a lot of joy? Ooh. In this season of my life, it has been being around community, like, like-minded individuals. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I spend a lot of, I've spent a lot of my life pouring out. Mm-hmm. And then not feeling as if I had people who could pour back into me and having out community of people, I felt I don't have to always hold space for them, but we can hold space for one another, allows me to step into my fullness.

The same piece that I had in my own solitude. Yeah. I now have that in abundance 'cause I'm amongst others who also have peace of their solitude. So we walk away for the better versions of ourselves after every encounter. And I'm like, okay, this is nice. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So community has really been a huge aspect for me in-person, community.

Mm-hmm. Particularly. Mm-hmm. I think virtual is nice. It's a tool. Yeah. It plays a part, but there's nothing that's gonna replace that. That in-person experience. No. You get to experience someone else's energy in your or in a same room. Exactly. You need to lift each other up. Mm-hmm. Well, and I think you get to energize one another with that, right.

To be able to be in someone's presence and like to feel, especially people that are more magnetic naturally and usually people that are more in touch with their soul and like are doing this type of work tend to be a little bit more like vivacious if you will in some way or grounded. But then, but they're giving back.

They're kind of like aiding you and they inspire. So you, I think do that with everyone that you're around. The first time I ever met you, I was like, I like him. I was like, he seems so nice and so like genuine lives where Senior smile and I was like, He, like, he's got like, he's, he's in it. He's like, he's there.

And it's because you can, you see someone for who they truly are. Like it's, you know, when you look into someone's eyes and you're like, that's them. And like there's no, there's no like filters, there's nothing like hiding from like that. They're hiding from, like they've, they've uncovered. It's all coming up to the surface and they're showing up fully and it's beautiful sight to see.

So, thank you. I know. Thank you. Thank you for extending into my community within this and I'm just, yeah. It's been so wonderful to watch you bloom and like to continue to see you and where, and I am thrilled to see where it goes next because I know it's only gonna continue to rise up. Oh, thank you. Appreciate you seen it.

Yeah. It was the first literally like, I was like talking now, I was like, mm-hmm. And I, I do have a little bit fairly intuitive and so I'm like, when I feel I'm like, oh. And I'll see, I can see people from a mile away. I'm like, Hmm, that person, Hilary is there. So she's like, what? And I'm like, something about him.

We're gonna figure it out by the end of today. I dunno what it is, but we're gonna figure it out by the end of today. And it always, she's like, always looks just, I was like, I don't know. I just like, I, I don't know. I could feel it. I feel my heart. So but I, yes. Oh, it's all about the subtleties one you are I think the more awareness that you start to build, the more that you have a deeper understanding of who you are, the more that you're able to see people for who they're, you can only see someone as far as you've gone, right.

And you've gone, I think, deeper than most, in all honesty, to hear all of the story and how it's gotten you to this point, there's no surprise that you've created this community around you because you are the kind of the epicenter of it. And it just keeps crumbling. It's just like, it keeps shaking shit up.

That's no plan. I know. I enjoy this part. I looked at Jesus' life and I'm like, he didn't start his ministry until third one. Oh wow. So like what was he doing before that? Mm-hmm. He was just going around studying. Yeah. Years there. Hang out with these people. Yeah. Meditate in the woods by himself. Spend a lot of time and time too.

So do a lot of shadow work. Mm-hmm. And then by the time he ate 30, he was like, okay, I need like 12 people who are down and like see what I'm about to do. Yeah. Because like, I can't write a long story. People won't believe. Crazy stuff about that. So he fostered a community of people. He felt line with him.

Wow. He just offered him my invitation that follow me. They had no idea what they were about to do. And now I have community of friends. I'm like, y'all down. And they're like, what about to do? I'm like, I don't even really know. Not quite sure.

Being able to do that work in my own time, in my own solitude. Yeah. And finding a growth mindset rather than a victim mindset mm-hmm. Has allowed me to show up in space, whole space for other people where I'm able to meet them wherever they are because I've, I've been there. Mm-hmm. And like mm-hmm.

I've grown from that place, so I never forgot my roots. Mm-hmm. And I see a lot of times when people get into esoterics, they get ungrounded in their practice. I'm like, no. Like my roots are still stable. I'm a product of my environment mm-hmm. And my experiences, but I do not have to be a reflection. No.

No. So having that mindset, I'm like, okay, it's a part to where you are. Yeah. But I can also guide you to Brian. Yeah. That there might be another place to go if you wanna go, if you like, if you still wanna follow along, like, but then to be an example, you are the living example of what could be. And I think being exactly who you are, finding these moments of joy and inspiration continues to show people where is possible for them too.

And it's like, why not? Why not try, give it a try? Yeah, you wanna stay where you're at. I mean, I'm cool being in comfort, but why would you want to stay in your comfort if you can Yeah. Grow Well, and that's like, I think so many people are like, oh, this is your comfort zone. So it feels safe, but it's like feeling safe doesn't necessarily mean that it's at where you're supposed to be.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. And so it's like sometimes leaning to discomfort is required in order for you to con, to be where you're meant to be, to arrive. No, and I, I think you've already created that community around you though. You know, like within this Instagram falling within the different spaces that you've created, like within the yoga community, within all of these different areas.

Like you're opening up the door for others to be able to join in. You're like, this is what I have to offer and I hope it's useful for you. And it's to be of service. I think that's always what it comes back to. It's like, how can I be of service to others to be able to help them get to where I am now by sharing the lessons I've learned along the way.

Which is, I think it takes courage to be able to be open about what you've experienced, to be able to share those pitfalls, the moments of achievement, the moments where you may have stumbled, that humanizes us, right? And that's what pe, that's what resonates, that's what connects us truly on that level.

And I remember you mentioning or at least I know that you're creating something called the Sanctuary, which might be a perfect place for that to be a place for you to share all of this. So can you tell us a little bit more about what that is? Yeah. So the sanctuary is a virtual school mm-hmm. For essentially a library of resources.

Mm-hmm. I've noticed that subscriptions, it's kind of like what people are investing in. Yeah. But how is that investment? How is the return on investment? Mm. Mm-hmm. We invest monthly into Netflix and Hulu and all these other plans. Are we receiving anything that helps us grow of value mm-hmm. Of value?

Right. And not just entertainment. Mm-hmm. We have enough entertainment around this place. How are we. Cultivating opportunities like build up more capacity for growth and wellness mm-hmm. Across our entire lives, right? Yeah. Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. Yeah. And our community. Mm-hmm.

Occupation, our physical wellness. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So the sanctuary is a space for us to feel safe enough to do the work, to feel that we're supported and encouraged, empowered. Mm-hmm. To show up as our best selves, knowing that we're striving to be an even better version of ourselves. Mm-hmm. So the library, or known as a sanctuary Yeah.

Is where I host the videos for beginner and basics. S Cool. Really walking people through tips and tutorials of like basics. Mm-hmm. It's hard to learn everything when you're in a 60 minute class. It's, it can be intimidating for people to even show up for the first time too. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's overwhelming.

Yeah. And I've noticed that long personal practice of nine years, I all mm-hmm. Where I felt the safest. Mm-hmm. So that was my sanctuary. Got it. And then also a part of that sanctuary is my body. One of my friend Savannah said, the only place I've ever felt at home was in my body. Wow. Mm-hmm. That statement opened my eyes to the realizing, okay, I can't control what's on the outside.

Mm-hmm. I have full control over this for the most part. Yeah. Yeah. So let me honor this sanctuary. Let me take care of this. Take care of it. Yeah. And let me find ways to support it, because this body is resilient. Mm-hmm. As much as we've tried to defeat it, unintentionally, giving it all the junk and all the terrible things, and all of the stuff that we've put it through, and still here, it's still pushing it.

It's thriving. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Well, now let's flip the script and let's come alongside it to Boost. Yeah. All right. But I realize now with my following over 94,000, I have no desire to serve all of these people single handed. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. It. That's why I like to do the shadow work. 'cause it's bigger than me.

Yeah. I do the work, I learn the lesson, and then I offer it to someone else so that they don't have to do the work the same way I do. Yeah. Because if I can help the collective mm-hmm. That helps me on the back indirectly. I like to just see plants grow, even if that plant doesn't do anything for me.

Exactly. I like, all I do is put water on it. Mm-hmm. So the sanctuary is my spot to just water. Water. Mm-hmm. I play season water. Mm-hmm. Here's a video of a yoga practice. Here's a mindfulness practice, here's a meditation practice. Yeah. There's also not just me, my partner is a pole coach. Yeah. So she's gonna have pole instruction in Florida.

Oh, so fun. Yeah. My friend Des a fitness instructor. Yeah. So she's got fitness videos. Cool. And then there's gonna be dharma talks. Mm-hmm. Because I, I enjoy preach. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Pulling that in. I want to continue to show up in the way that feels offensive to me, that I have fun with. Mm-hmm. So offering a space for people to hear the teachings of other practices.

Mm-hmm. Right. Not just from the yogic standpoint. Mm-hmm. From Dallas. Can do it. Mm-hmm. From books. Yeah. Right. From conversations where iron sharpens iron. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And I'm like, okay, this is a space where people can tune in. Yeah. And capture something that can really push them forward towards their own wellness without having to feel so alone in their work.

Mm-hmm. And realize this is a spot where I can tune in and hear from real people Yeah. Who've gone through real situations. Mm-hmm. And come out on the other side. Yeah. Really better. And if I can learn from one another, right? Mm-hmm. Then we can help each other grow as a collective. Yeah. So that's what the sanctuary is all about, is cultivating a safe space at your home, wherever you are.

Mm-hmm. That you can feel safe enough to do the work, so that you can take care of this sanctuary. Mm-hmm. So that when we all come together, the Bible says that the church is the people, right? Mm-hmm. They are the body of Christ. They Christ. Yeah. Well, how can we all come together so we can be a reflection of that whole.

Yeah. I'm so excited for this to come together. I haven't heard of anything along these lines, and I think it's going to make an incredible impact on like a very large scale. And that is, I think exactly what you're intended to do. You know, this is how I changed the world. Yeah. This is one of the ways Yeah.

Playing on change. Do you feel like you had this kind of kind of vision earlier on? Or like, did it come to you? How did, how did this idea come to fruition? In bits and pieces. Okay. And at one point I wanted to find a way to serve, but I didn't know mm-hmm. What that looked like. Yeah. So I was trying to do it in the way that everybody else had already been doing it.

Mm. Okay. Because it felt tangible, like, oh, I can do that 'cause someone else has done. But then at some point I said, I wanna change the world or not to do that in the way that no one else is doing. Mm-hmm. So what do I feel uniquely is inspiring to go in this direction? I said, well, I love friends. And to do things with friends.

Yeah. And I love to play and move my body and to explore the capabilities of this thing. Yeah. I also love to explore my mind. Yeah. So how can I put all this in one spot? Mm-hmm. But also be able to take care of not just myself, but for my friends and family who right now are living, you know, fi financially it might not be the best.

This is an opportunity for us to take care of ourselves. Mm-hmm. But also still provide valuable resources to the people so that this is a return on investment. That one plus one equals a million. Right. The synergy. Yes. This is an affordable. Membership. Mm-hmm. Anybody can afford. Yeah. So that anybody can take care of themselves because luxury should not, well, wellness should not be a luxury.

Luxury. Yeah. It should be a right, it's, it should be one. But then I think in today's society, you know, yoga studios are should expensive. It's, there's so many barriers to entry for people to be able to even access this type of information, especially if you don't know where to begin. That this is just that kind of, that perfect sweet spot to be like, here's this overview.

Come here. You can access all these different things, whatever jives with you, whatever you find that release within and what you find joy in. And then like, let's dive deeper within ourselves and then that in turn ripples through all those communities, all those different areas, all those people. And then that's like, that's what, that's what will change the world.

You know, that's, it's 1% at a time. That's.

Meditation, yoga practice. You doing poll? I don't care. I don't care. No. Whatever you need at that season, like mm-hmm. The idea is that you can go to this one spot mm-hmm. And access it. Mm-hmm. Five minutes or 50 minutes. Okay. No, but just take care of yourself. Yeah. That's my whole thing. That's what's helping me get to where I'm, yeah.

Learning the different tools, how to take care of myself. Yeah. And now that I've done the work, I want to present it so that way others don't have to do nearly as much. Mm-hmm. So if it took me 10 years mm-hmm. Maybe it might take you five. Yeah. And I'm grateful for that. Truly. And hopefully in year five you're able to teach it and it can offer someone else the opportunity to do that and a half and we can further our whole entire race because like what I'm going through is bigger than me.

Mm-hmm. What you're going through is bigger than you. Mm-hmm. And you're not the first person to experience it far from the first Wow. Far from, or 8 billion people on the planet right now. Mm-hmm. Who all came before us. Yeah. They paved the way. How can we continue to pave the way for life in a positive direction?

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Well, and that's because you are seeing the effects of this within your own life and you're like, why? How can I not share? I remember when I first got my younger teacher certification, it was the first time I ever felt peace within myself and actually self, like I really, actually, it was the first time I remember at the end of training I was like, I like myself.

Mm-hmm. And I don't dunno if I've ever really liked myself, like I smile because I'm actually truly happy. Not because I'm trying to make everyone else feel more at ease. And I was like this, like I found this in yoga and meditation and like, I want to become a teacher so I can help others access this because we all deserve to be genuinely happy.

Wow. Like, we, like, it's our gi it's our God given, right? So like, but we gotta, sometimes you gotta go through some mud before you arrive there. And that's but that's, I think that's the part we're creating more community around that is so powerful because there's, where else do you really, outside of therapy, where else do you really go and just like, grieve with one another?

Or go and talk about the dark aspects of your personality that you're ashamed of. Like, where else do you really have space to do that? And that's honestly why I created the podcast because I was like, can we all come? Like, can we, like I'm going through the churches over here sometimes, right? I'm in it.

So like, can we do this together? Can I talk about this? Can I be open? Like, I don't wanna have shame around these things like this, like, we're all in this, we're, we're all doing this, we're all experiencing in different levels. So like, let's support each other. Let's love on each other as we do it too.

'cause like life's too short. And it's not meant to spend alone. No, it's definitely not meant to dispense alone, even though I do love my solitude. I'm not gonna lie to you. I do like solitude, but I love the way you phrased it earlier was like I, I found solitude and I appreciate that. But then I found a community around me like where you said you found joy.

It's like I found a community around me that fueled me or like filled me up so that I like and like en enhanced my life. These are all people that are enhancing my life and making me feel like I'm a better person. And also I'm just feeling more joy. It's just now an abundance of it. I was like, hmm.

Feels five people who are doing the work too. Yeah. That's what it comes down to. And like, I think then everyone has, or like, you know, might be in different steps, you know, or people are on the path, they're doing the work and then they pause and then they're doing the work again. But And I tend to, I, I tend to gravitate towards people that like, are curious about it, that are thinking about it, but maybe haven't done it quite yet.

Mm-hmm. And then it's like, and I'm just in it and I'm so open about it and I'm like, come on. Yeah. I know. Are you ready? Come on. Do you want learn something? We fun.

Like, unless we're laughing and at some point, like, we might be crying too at some point, but it'll be the whole spectrum, the whole

crying. Yeah. 10, that's, I'm not no, you're not alone. And you holding in this space mm-hmm. For us to hear the stories mm-hmm. Hear the testimonies of how other people have overcome their own shadow. Now stepping into the light being more of a light in a dark. Mm-hmm. Yes. With this. Now we're that glimmer of life.

Yeah. For others, right? I know. We my trigger. Yeah. We're that glimmer. We're the glimmer to inspire, to remind them that there's love in the world, that we're, there's other people doing this. There's other people on the same path. Come on, grab a hand. We're in like, let's go together. Like let's do, let's go together.

That's what I really believe about it too. It's like I don't, I think that that's what we're just like, I think that's what this generation, this is what we're supposed to be supporting each other and doing and the platforms that we have and the way that we can connect on a global scale. It's like, why not?

He had 12. Let's go y'all there. I When you were talking about that, I hadn't thought about it in that way and I was like, damn, you really understood that though. Like really Right. Regular dude who was a carpenter was like, I'm got a couple ladies who also ride with us. Yeah. We're just gonna go change the world.

Never underestimate the power of small group of people to change the world. They're the only people that ever have. All right. Is that Margaret Mead? Yeah. Come on. I don't need 5,000. I just need five. Yeah. But believe in it and then they're gonna, but then they're, you know, again, it's like, it's the, it's the effect.

It's like you drop that one little rock into the ocean, like just was the rock and then it spread, but he, but then it keeps the spider, it keeps connecting. Yep. Oh, I, I can't wait. Let's change. So I dunno what I'm singing. I was like, I don't even know what I'm seeing. Right. Oh, well thank you so much, so much conversation with me.

It was such a beautiful, it was, it was such a, it was honestly my pleasure. And I am so excited to see what comes through with the sanctuary and I would love for other people to connect with you. Where can they find you? Yeah, they find me on Instagram and just like Trevor. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And that's primarily where I'm at.

Right. Yeah. I like to keep it simple for Instagram right now. All your one place? Mm-hmm. In a few weeks. Oh, in two weeks. Okay. Okay. Right around the corner, we'll be able to tap into that community. Mm-hmm. Be part of that because it's bigger than me. Mm-hmm. It's not just about my following, finding other resources.

Mm-hmm. So the community of people who feed into me help me become the version that I'm today. They have now direct access to those same individuals. Yeah. So they can follow us. Mm-hmm. Towards, I can go making the way, carving the path. A pioneer do it. I tried to fight being pioneer. Why? Because I was afraid.

I was like, this is uncomfortable. And I realized like, this is what I'm destined to. This is what I enjoy doing. Yeah. You're blazing a new trail for a reason. Been doing. A lot. Yeah. Since you were a kid. 18. Pastor At 18, I'd say first experience, it was like, I dunno, I'm not changing.

No. One. One. Yeah. But then, but then you won't be the last. And that's, that's the nature of this all is that you then set, give someone the blueprint to be able to do it for themselves. And like you said, like cutting back the time for someone to be able to change it. They'll never do it the same way, but it'll be done.

They got a unique genetic code. Yeah, they should do. They do. Oh. Alright. We can keep going. We can keep going for a long time. But yes. So thank you. Thank all of you for listening in on this conversation. Follow this guy. He is also not bad to look at either, so that's not a bad idea. I dunno. I didn't mean to make it up.

I was like, look, I'm gonna pass it in there in case you're listening on or on a podcast. But but yeah let us know if you have any questions, if you have any feedback, if you wanna comment or even just like share what you, a nugget of insight that you acquired through the course of this hour together.

Would love to hear what really popped out at you and what resonated. So comment below for on YouTube if you find me on Instagram at farino and yeah, or visit my website coaching with vera.com to be able to gain more access to what else we have to share. And like, I'll make sure, I'll definitely plug in in the sanctuary when it comes out in the next couple weeks.

But follow through, check it out, see what I'm excited to take a pull class is actually what I come. Let's do it. Come on. I here with you've my first It would've been, yeah. It's humbling. It's so, especially it's all the opposite muscles and then yoga. It, it's such a good counter to yoga though, because it's the pull, like it's the, like, it's so much strength too.

I know that's what you brought. I just started doing it. I had a Pilates boss and I'm still sore from it, but, Ooh. Having a fight against that, my leg was sh like literally like quivering? Yeah. The full reformer. It was next level. One of my friends is a teacher. She's like, you should just come. And I was like, oh, okay.

I'm like, terrified. I'm like, but you know, I'm like, how many people do I talk to? I was talking to gonna yoga class, you know, it's intimidating. All these things. So I'm like, okay, I should do this because I do this to people all the time. Yeah. So I went, but it was, I felt really good afterwards. You feel like, you know, when you do something for the first time and you just feel really strong and you're like, I did that shit.

You know, like, but was like, you know, I stumbled a little bit. We were definitely shaken. She like looked at me. She was like, you're feeling it? I was like, I'm breathing. I.

You obviously what's happening here? You see me, you see me, but it was what was so good and now I wanna go back. It's like again, mixing it up like we have this practice. I love yoga. I've always, you know, I've been practicing yoga since 2000, what was it? Seven? I think it was when I first like, really got into it and like started regularly going to class.

So like, it's been a part of my life for so long. I can't imagine my life without it. And I, I don't imagine that I ever will. Actually, while I was pregnant, I couldn't practice. For two months. I, I taught yoga until I was eight months pregnant. And then I yeah, but, you know, I just, like, I was, was modifying and I practiced yoga in studio's, Vinyasa yoga until I was seven months pregnant.

I don't, like, I know the ladies would come in and I'd be like, I was like, I'm gonna modify, I'm a teacher though, so like, don't even worry. I couldn't lay on my back. I couldn't lay on my stomach. I couldn't have my legs close together. So, as you can imagine, it was a very. Modified practice, but I wanted to keep the strength, like I wanted to still feel strong and in touch with my body.

And I knew that the increased circulation was gonna be beneficial for my baby. So I was like, you know what, we'll just see. And obviously you can't twist. Like it was a very modified practice, but I was still in it. Some limitations too. I know. Sheesh. But then I had to find other, actually at that point, I had to find other ways to access that flow.

I had to find the my piece, 'cause yoga's been my piece for so long. That was like, Fuck. Now what do I do now? So I like kept going to classes 'cause that's where I was like seeking out. And I was like, so I really drilled into my meditation practice. It became longer, a little bit more sensitive, longer holds.

'cause I was like, okay, I gotta drop in. If this is the way I'm gonna drop in, I'm gonna take a little bit longer, but I can get there. And then walking actually became a huge meditation for me too. So going on, walking meditations, being really present, not bringing my phone, just like walking around.

Like, I would take my dog for walks and like, I would just like, you know, failing leaves, being in touch with nature. And then I would go sit someone for a little bit, be able to regroup and come back. So I just find you find the way. Okay. Because I can everyone's like, I can't believe you're still firing me.

I was like, I kind of need this for my, like mental health. I'm gonna be.

This is the, like, this is what works for me. And so like, and I think, and I think for probably like for anyone that's listening, it's like once you find what works, it's like, and you, you get like, it's like literally you open up this well and it's just like you start, like, it all starts coming. You get more energized.

You just feel like you, yourself, you feel like alive. And it's like once you feel that, it's like, why would I wanna live on any other way? I can't imagine my life living any other way.

Shadow show shadows. I'm working on the shadow, I'm working on the shadows, I'm working on the shadow. This space,

you, you recognize, you learn about yourself and then it's like, and then you realize, okay, I don't have to like necessarily show up in that way because I have these things. That's why I was wondering like how do you set step back and we talked about this like stepping back when you're triggered, when you have these moments, because it's set, it's like to correct that, to be able to stop and to really pause and to be the observer and not to just go down the rabbit hole that you normally go.

You're literally the neural pathways that you've already designed in your like brain. It's like literally de like is driving you through. It's like. Gotta rewire that. I think you catch the first thing in the morning. Yes. Like yourself first thing. Yes. Yeah. We try to take care of anybody else. Yeah. Take care of stuff.

Mm-hmm. Otherwise you'll just go off of yesterday's energy. Yep. And you might be running low, yesterday's energy. You might not be a hundred percent when you wake up. Yeah. Yeah. So that day I'm giving those examples. Yeah. Begin practice to start the day is what set me on the course. Mm-hmm. I did something that was slow.

Yeah. And then the rest of the day was fast. Oh. I was like, I have a balance. Yeah. Good thing that you did it. Think if you had a corporate at that in the morning, it was a rough day of therapy in traffic and anybody that followed after. Oh man. But that's the work, right? Mm-hmm. That's like how you, like, how can you have a more enjoyable experience, not only for yourself, but for those around you too.

Take care of yourself first. Take care of yourself. You gotta take, self care is not selfish. I always remind people that take care of yourself. People, so many people, especially moms, I know, it's like, take care of yourself. 'cause you show up so much more, like authentically and more patience and just all the things when you take care of yourself first.

Otherwise, how can you give from an empty tank? You got nothing to give, you have nothing to give. I much rather to share from my uncle. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. That that is true there. There I was like, I, you know, I have my daughter and she knows Mama Meditates in the morning when she was younger it was a little bit harder, but like now she's four.

And then she's like, are you gonna meditate mommy? I'm like, yeah, I gotta meditate before we start our day. So, 'cause if she comes, wakes me up, she wakes up a little earlier and then I'll come in. And so I'm like, do you wanna come meditate with me? And so now it's been this wonderful thing for me to share with her.

And so then she comes and now she goes, breathe in. Breathe out. And she's like, whenever she's like, mommy, sometimes when I get upset, I breathe in and I breathe out and I makes it feel better. And I'm like, like I just try, like, I, like I, I want her to see the ENTs positive reinforcement. Right. So like, I wanna know, I'm excited, but like, I'm like, that is so good for me and I'm so happy that that like, makes you feel happier.

And like I, we just like had this little conversation and she's just like, and I'm like, I'm so grateful that you do that. And like in my mind I'm like thinking, please always do this. Like, I wish I knew this when I was younger. I wish I knew this information when I was a little kid. You know? And like, it's just, you know, but we're all, every generation, every time we're all growing, we're all getting better and we're helping each other through it, so.

Right. Yeah. And you raise 'em up in that way. Mm-hmm. When they grow old, they will not depart. No. So you realizes this is a helpful tool. Yeah. And how long did it take us to get to that point? We were alive, twenties. Now she's four. Four. Yeah. I'd much rather be in her position had I been four. Yeah. And already had the tools.

I, and that's why I knew that there was a zero down in my mind when I, when I had her, I was like, this is gonna become such an integral part of her practice for her as her upbringing. And I don't wanna force it on her. So that's why I was scared, because I was like, I don't want her to feel like she has to do this.

Or like, because she's a very strong-willed child. And so I'm like, I don't wanna like force her. 'cause I know that will, the resistance will appear and it'll be like, mommy wants me to do this too much. You know? And so then I like, I take it back. And then when she's curious, when she's interested, I share.

When she's not, it's okay. But like, it's more when she's in discomfort, it's like, how can she handle discomfort in a more easeful kind of way? 'cause otherwise she gets, you know, and I'm like, honey, and I grab her little hands, I look her in the eyes. I'm like, we need to breathe in. We're gonna breathe out.

And she's like, okay. And then we'll do it together a couple times. I'm like, do you feel a little bit better? And she's like, mm-hmm. I'm like, okay. And then it's like, you know, it doesn't have to be extraordinary. It's not, you know, everything, but like she's got that little bit. And if that's all I teach her, if that's all she takes from all of it, I, I do feel like I've done something.

I've made a positive impact. Really long. She, creative approach. I know. I can't wait to see, honestly. I'm excited. She's a little firecracker too. She's gonna be a little boss lady. I know.

I, I'm actually trying to lean into the acceptance of that part of my personality. 'cause I've always been really nice and like, I think and like comforting and nurturing and loving, but to like almost embrace my more like sassy side has been like, that's been one of my greatest teachers, my greatest lessons.

It's been like, it's okay to be sassy. Doesn't make me like. Less, in all honesty, we're gonna go into the root shadow, less desirable to be a dominant, independent female, that that was a real, like, we had to break through some gut to be able to be like, I can show up in this way and that the right males within my life will perceive this in a positive light.

They're gonna like that side of me, and it's going to be a turn on versus a turn off. And that was like, we had to change a lot of things in this mind for me to be able to be okay with it. And so now we're, we're breaking through a little bit. So definitely a full of I know that's what I like. I can't even see upset and I'm like, Hmm, yeah, I don't get upset often.

But I am a little bit of a, I'm more dominant than I like to say that I'm, and that's like what I'm trying to like be okay with now. And I love, I love cold space for people. I'm very compassionate. But then at the same time, like I can't have a Commanding presence, if you will, sometimes. But I think in the yoga, like there's so many different areas where it does serve me, but then it's like, can I be that leader while still lovingly holding, helping others up too?

And I think that that's like the, the kind yin and yang and how they blend together. Definitely. Yeah. Honor my y all. Whoa. Alrighty. Let's go. Okay, well we just added on like that's okay. But I we appreciate you guys being here. Follow along, keep it coming and can't wait to see what comes next. Yeah.

Look forward to seeing what next season of your life look like. Oh, thank you. I know. Thanks everyone. Thanks. I love you.